That time of year again...

I've been at uni for seven long years now - almost finished though! Throughout that time I've noticed a slow, but inevitable, change in my attitude towards new students...

Once again it's come round to that time of year when the new wave of Freshers hit the campus. It's a great chance for an overhaul in their entire lifestyle - they can redefine who they are the very day before they come to uni, start from a blank canvas. Yay! For current students, new arrivals also means fresh talent potential. Yay again! It all soon loses its edge though - after being there, doing that, and making a mess of a perfectly good t-shirt... it soon wears off.

So now I see new students roaming around my campus and I can't help feeling like I wish they weren't there. Not in a horrible "why don't they just die way", but a more gentle and subtle way of "bugger off". When I ponder as to why I'm thinking like this, I often come straight up with the protective "I was here first" scenario. It fits most of the criteria I guess. It certainly explains how I enjoy sending people over the A30 to the music department when they're asking for directions to new halls. Serve's 'em right for not knowing better say I.

But lately I've been re-examining this fresher contempt. Now I think maybe the reason may be jealousy. Jealous that they are just starting their university experience, and that I'm just finishing. Seeing as this is a thoroughly nicer way of looking at it than the previous excuse - I'm gunna go with it for a while. See how it feels on.

So for now, freshers, I'm not sneering at you because you're sitting in my proverbial seat - but because I want to be where you are right now... unless you're reading this from the bed of your latest fresher-fling. In which case I'd better not want to be where you are as my girlfriend could get nasty.

Brainiac and its offspring

I don't like it. I've been ranting about this TV show many times over my coffee breaks - to the point the I think I've lost the attention (and r.e.s.p.e.c.t.) of my colleagues. Now before I go off on one about Brainiac and its test tube baby I think I'd better point out the following:

• Yes - I KNOW its just a bit of fun.
• I realise that regardless of the methods, it is getting people interested in science.
• It does try to look at the more quirky side of science.
• It does try to answer the more pub-like questions.
  
• There are a lot of cool and random explosions
• People get hurt in funny ways (hair pulling of test gimps, etc).

However - even considering all of the above - this show still pisses me off something cronic.

First of all: Jon Tickle. What a twat. How some big brother reject with a THIRD CLASS degree in physics is qualified to preach science to ANYONE is beyond my comprehension. Oh, and before you ask... no - I'm not jealous that he's using his (poor excuse for a) physics degree to net him wads of (undeserved) cash and (questionable) fame.

Next comes the complete disregard for standardisation of experiments. Does no one else ever see this program and think - "hang on, this is complete bollocks". For instance - the other day they tested which methods worked best for reducing tears when cutting onions: wet towel, lemon in mouth, or candles. Cool, interesting, and a different take on the whole onion cutting theme. So why for the love of God must they proceed to carry out the experiment in such a way as to make the whole thing pointless!?!? Testing each idea on a different guy is pointless! Surely they must realise that they're introducing all sorts of unaccountable factors - such as how one person will react differently to stimuli than another!?!

Lack of safety warnings. Ok - so they do have a generic "don't try this at home" disclaimer surrounding each 'experiment'. However, some things do slip past them. A popular theme on the show at the moment is to get celebreties to breathe in helium and say something funny. Ha ha. What they don't say is "oh, by the way - helium is a natural asphyixiant and can KILL you". A few minutes of pure helium use will suffocate you. Simple fact.

There's so much more I want to say. Most of it about the ineptitude of a certain Mr. Tickle. However, I guess the viewer ratings speak for themselves and so I don't imagine the show changing any time soon.

Helpful signs

I haven't posted on my blog for a while now. This is largely because I have been far too busy with writing my thesis... but also because I can never remember the interesting things that I want to post.

So I'm going to post something rather boring. This is a post about signs that I've seen today. Now I don't mean astrological signs, or voodoo christian signs from a ficticious god... I mean everyday road signs and public notices.

On the way into work today I saw a helpful LED matrix sign proclaiming "Thieves operating in this area" followed by "Remove all valuables from car". I couldn't help but wonder if this was a sign telling a potential theft victim to be on guard... or just a basic set of instructions flagged up for the local thieves.

Again, on public signs - I've always been a bit concerned about the apparent need for the government to write "Look right" at a pedestrian crossing point. I realise that this may be helpful to foreign visitors or where the street is not operating as per the norm... but I'm a little concerned with where its written. Surely the best sign to paint on the road is some abbreviated form of "Look at the traffic - not the bloody floor. Idiot"

Then we have the signs that are designed for idots. I'm specifically thinking of the kind of signs that have been put in place to cater for those people that would have naturally fallen by the wayside in human evolution if it wasn't for the caring few. Signs like "Caution Hot!" on the side of your newly purchased coffee. Surely you'd be pissed off it was cold? So why expect it to be anything other than hot?!? You don't see signs like "Warning - risk of brain-freeze" written on ice-cream packaging do you! Nope - coz its damn obvious that it's going to be cold.

Now I could continue on to interesting signs pointing to towns that have naughty names. I won't though as I think this is slightly crass and I think that the towns in question only have themselves to blame.