Socks
When I was a kid I was growing up in a household with 4 other males and I have to say that there was literally havoc when it came to sock laundry.
(Note that underwear laundry is a completely different subject, and due to the horrific memories, near skidmark incidents, and stifling encounters associated with this topic I won't be dwelling on this area at all in this post)
How many people out there were bought the generic "Wilson" branded black sports socks by their parents? I can guess that a lot of people are already nodding in agreement with me about this point at least. But imagine 5 males in one household all owning identical black wilson socks - all in the generic 3-12 sizes.... in my books sharing socks with brethren is only topped in the "most disgusting forced habits" as sharing (shudder...) underwear. You know that after a few wash loads you're never gunna have any confidence that the socks you're wearing haven't shared others' feet before.
I think that is why now, at the age of 25, I'm now retaliating. My sock draw now contains socks where every single pair is unique! The most multi-coloured and horrendous pairs of socks now line my sock draw. There will be no mistaking these beauties! Indeed my favourite has to be the ones similar to these:
Except that my pair are coloured more in the sense of the mid-90's opening scenes of BBC's Top of the Pops! Wicked. I also have a pair that is strikingly similar to the outfit worn by Beetlejuice - you know the one I mean....
I think however that this revolution in sock wear had come slightly too late in my life. Soon I shall be embarking upon my first 'real' job and for some reason I have the notion that prospective clients and bosses will not fully appreciate the effort that has gone into my choice of socks.
So I beg any prospective parent out there... let your child express their identity through their socks at a young age whilst they still have the freedom to do so. Failing to listen to this advice will only cause heartache, foot disease, and an unhealthy sexual obsession with tube socks.
(Note that underwear laundry is a completely different subject, and due to the horrific memories, near skidmark incidents, and stifling encounters associated with this topic I won't be dwelling on this area at all in this post)
How many people out there were bought the generic "Wilson" branded black sports socks by their parents? I can guess that a lot of people are already nodding in agreement with me about this point at least. But imagine 5 males in one household all owning identical black wilson socks - all in the generic 3-12 sizes.... in my books sharing socks with brethren is only topped in the "most disgusting forced habits" as sharing (shudder...) underwear. You know that after a few wash loads you're never gunna have any confidence that the socks you're wearing haven't shared others' feet before.
I think that is why now, at the age of 25, I'm now retaliating. My sock draw now contains socks where every single pair is unique! The most multi-coloured and horrendous pairs of socks now line my sock draw. There will be no mistaking these beauties! Indeed my favourite has to be the ones similar to these:
Except that my pair are coloured more in the sense of the mid-90's opening scenes of BBC's Top of the Pops! Wicked. I also have a pair that is strikingly similar to the outfit worn by Beetlejuice - you know the one I mean....
I think however that this revolution in sock wear had come slightly too late in my life. Soon I shall be embarking upon my first 'real' job and for some reason I have the notion that prospective clients and bosses will not fully appreciate the effort that has gone into my choice of socks.
So I beg any prospective parent out there... let your child express their identity through their socks at a young age whilst they still have the freedom to do so. Failing to listen to this advice will only cause heartache, foot disease, and an unhealthy sexual obsession with tube socks.
posted by ugli-stix at 1.8.06
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